Friday, September 25, 2009

The Invitation by Oriah Mountain Dreamer



It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living.
I want to know what you ache for
and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing.

It doesn’t interest me how old you are.
I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool
for love
for your dream
for the adventure of being alive.


It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring your moon...
I want to know if you have touched the centre of your own sorrow
if you have been opened by life’s betrayals
or have become shrivelled and closed
from fear of further pain.

I want to know if you can sit with pain
mine or your own
without moving to hide it
or fade it
or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy
mine or your own
if you can dance with wildness
and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes
without cautioning us
to be careful
to be realistic
to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me
is true.
I want to know if you can
disappoint another
to be true to yourself.
If you can bear the accusation of betrayal
and not betray your own soul.
If you can be faithless
and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see Beauty
even when it is not pretty
every day.
And if you can source your own life
from its presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure
yours and mine
and still stand at the edge of the lake
and shout to the silver of the full moon,
Yes.”

It doesn’t interest me
to know where you live or how much money you have.
I want to know if you can get up
after the night of grief and despair
weary and bruised to the bone
and do what needs to be done
to feed the children.

It doesn’t interest me who you know
or how you came to be here.
I want to know if you will stand
in the centre of the fire
with me
and not shrink back.

It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom
you have studied.
I want to know what sustains you
from the inside
when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone
with yourself
and if you truly like the company you keep
in the empty moments.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

754am.


   I woke up to the wonderful voice of Jason Mraz, singing "Wake up everyone, how can you sleep at a time like this unless dreamer is the real you?" My 6 am alarm has never been this effective. How can you not smile and dance yourself out of bed with that song? A few moments later, Kace calls-- "Hello??!!! Answer your land line, the guard won't let me in!"
   We walk to the pool and meet a bunch of interesting characters. Apparently, there is a morning swimming club of sorts in Acropolis. We meet Tita Ita, who's dropped 4 sizes by her swimming. Her husband-- the name slips my memory-- has lost 60 pounds. Their Mom, who is 76-- could barely walk through the pool when she started and is now doing laps. They had a swimming coach-- I forget his name too. He tells us swimming success stories-- a 300+ man betting with his brother that he could lose weight-- Did, and won 150 grand. They invite us to swim with them every morning. Kace says "Si Ina nalang." I would actually really like to. We tell them that we're getting in shape for the New Balance Power Race on the 27th-- He says we should swim with pants so that we build the stamina of our legs. Will do that-- Tomorrow? Lets see. I've got 10 days. He also says that we should sleep before 10pm until the rest because our bodies won't recover. I don't think that's possible. We ask him if we'll lose weight if we don't sleep that much--he just laughs at us. "Just swim everyday," he says. Kace? Game! Then we jog around the village-- "We can do this, we can do this" and we did. One round around the village-- I ask Kace "You think its at least 1K already?" she says "I think, its way more than that. Tama na, Ayoko na!" And so we make it back to my house. My mother goes "What? You're finished already? You were tying your shoes longer than that." At least we're starting somewhere.
     It's 754 in the morning. Kace and I are sipping coffee and eating Oatmeal. Hers with milk and sugar, mine is the tasteless kind-- seems to be a bit sour. My mother is playing some music on the radio. It's 92.3, I'm not sure if its bossa or jazz-- but it's the kind of music you listen to while sitting on a coffee shop in the french riviera-- or at least that's where the music sends me. My mom is painting in the lanai, finishing up her playing kids. Chi comes down and is spray painting a helmet and spear for his Western History war simulation on Saturday. What a wonderful way to start the day. The people I love most-- My mom, my brother and best friend-- in the Philippines at least. I wish Kisa, Julian and Alex were here too. Just sitting around, random stories-- Kace, lending my mother Mizuno rackets. "Akin nalang to?" "We should watch Chi's War thing-- 530 am Saturday" Chi says "It's not going to be fun." Gossip about Chi's ex-Mother-law-to-be texting him-- I have to find out more about this. We ask Chi to take our jumping pictures out on the street for this blog. It was a hoot! "I think that was a fail" -- "I think that was your fail!" He get's tired of our failures but we laugh heartily.Kace says "Ina, don't post that-- I still want to find a boyfriend someday."
    What a way to start the day. I love getting up in the morning doing other things before getting into work mode-- It just takes the weight off working because your day isn't all about that. It's so early in the morning, there's so much else that could happen.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

mintishineful
adjective
a refreshing sparkle of the mundane

Yesterday was mintishineful.

Make your own words.

Friday, September 4, 2009

Walking on A Dream

Listen to walking on a dream while you read :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eimgRedLkkU

Chris and I were perched on a big rock a distance from everyone else down the river. The rushing waters, the rustling of the trees from the breeze, the birds chirping, the sound of laughter-- enough to drown out voices of worry, fears and uncertainty in anyone's head. If we turned our heads, looking back-- we'd see turbulent waters, strong currents racing through scattered rocks. But up ahead, the gleaming emerald water was calm, and still--serene on a backdrop of pale blue skies, with white fluffy clouds surrounded by the freshest green of the leaves on the trees and the moss on the rocks. A Carabao sits by the water. Locals, taking a bath in the river with their children in their underwear. KC wading in the shallow water, lost in thought. Kitchie giggling as she sat on the rocks across the bank, oblivious to the fact that she was shivering. Lynn, laughing while trying to get her shoulders below the water without getting swept away by the current. Kate balanced on a rock with that big smile on her face that makes you wonder "Are her eyes open?"  Ken atop a rock by the bank beside the Adams kids, ready to make the leap. Dash standing in the water up to hid knees, "Sucking it." Fonta, with his feet in the water behind the lens of his camera, capturing everything. I am consumed by content and overwhelmed by gratitude. How lucky am I to be where I am right now? I must be doing something right in my life. And then I realize, so this is what it feels like to be walking on a dream.

Ken Alonzo, also know as King Ken. I know we never got to talk-- maybe because you and Kitch were busy being lovebirds hehe ;)) Thank you for welcoming us to your kingdom that is Pannzian-- as far as the eye can see. From a distance, I can already tell what a fine young man you are. Seriously. The way you handle all the blows these boys throw at you, is LUPET to me. You have a way of owning up to the blows and elevating yourself. I don't really understand how you do it so I can't write about it so well. Your warmth, sincerity, security resonates in every move you make. All I know Ken, is that I hope my sons grow up to be like you. Till our next adventure! Roll out! Roll out!

Kitchie Lazatin, who very very sadly I did not get the chance to talk to much. I did enjoy eavesdropping on your love story as you were talking to Kace at the bonfire and Lynn in the room-- thank you for not minding me there hehe :)) Don't worry I will not divulge the contents of your conversations-- some overly chismoso and vain boys from Pannzian might be snooping around as well. Hehehe ;)) Thank you for your warmth and the great company, the laughter and the pink pony tail you lent me-- I still have it. Promise next time we go to Pannzian-- and that's not an IF, thats a WHEN--I will bore you with all the possible stories I can think of and will expect as much in return. Could also be another adventure in another place----- but then again, future Queen of Panzzian ka na e.

Lynn Pinugu, is it a double N or just one? I get confused. This girl surprises me. I have to  admit that I honestly thought it was drunk talk coming out of you when you said you would come to Pagudpod with us. I didn't think that you could handle the bus, the trek-- to me you just seem daintily sheltered in a way-- Not bad, not bad at all, it is a mere circumstance. Nag tatagalog ka pala, Lynn Pugu! It could also be those pretty little dresses of yours, always fixed always poised. Does not mean that this way of life was aborted in Pannzian, yes you still wore your pretty little dresses, even to the bus-- with only a cardigan with no heating capacity-- the table cloth of a dress, the flowers in her hair. You pushing yourself to over come your fears, to go beyond yourself---Wait, this strangely sounds like me. I think we are more alike that we realize. I found your dreams amusing. To be a princess, "Dash, Pigaain mo to" and to be a Travel show host-- I promise to watch your "Oh Tokyo" show with as much faith as the original one. It really enjoyed getting to know you better, crossing that bridge between Church friends, and real friends.  I have a good feeling that this will be the start of a great friendship, or so I am hoping. And one last thing, I was actually holding back tears when you started to cry after saying you'd stay. Sometimes I feel like all my words of inspiration and God fall into deaf ears, like no one listens or understands--- this is why most of the time I say it as a joke, because most people take it as such. But you Lynn, you understood. Thank you for listening, thank you for staying.

Jose Enrique Maningas, the dashing debonair. I was really excited when Chris told me that you were coming to the trip, I kid you not-- and that's an extra excited Ina pa ha. For some reason, I knew that we would just be laughing more with you around even though I just met you a couple of times at that place named after your kind. Grilla -- Gorilla?? Okay, Corny talaga ako. Most of the time I can't tell whether or not you are seriously nice to me or whether you are mocking me-- but either way, I love being around you. I don't really take "pangasars" well, but I don't really mind anymore with you because it sort of feels like you do it because i matter to you -- and I can feel some sort of sweetness behind it all. Maybe that's just me, but I would like to hope so.  If it be through these jabs that we build our friendship on, so be it. Thank you for bringing me joy-- this is my translation of "Natutuwa ako sayo."

Kate Lim whose laughter and genuine smiles I find comforting. She has no qualms about her, which I admire. She is the first archeologist that I've met. Her stories and theories of gold artifacts hidden somewhere in the unexplored vastness of the Philippine lands sparked my curiosity over Pineapple and Rice Wine while sitting by the bonfire, our faces hot but our spirits high. The Adam's tribal band (Okay I made this up) serenading us while the Lost boys tinkered with their toys finding the best way to capture the moment.  We talk of these boys, and how they started out in doubt-- but look at where they are now. Your eyes light up in awe, inspired by the road these Lost boys have taken-- but you neglect see that you are inspiring yourself, Kate. I was even more surprised to find out that you had worked at El Nido and Boracay, you dive, you are going to teach, taking your MA in archaeology-- I think to myself "This girl is so cool, and ganda pa ng hair nya." I am really inspired to build my blog like you suggested-- this is a product of your reassuring words and awesome example. Lupet mo Kate Clapping my hands-- "Oy, Oy, Oyoyoy!" I am looking forward to hear about your marine archaeological finds in the near future.

Chris Yuhico who they call the devastator-- please take note that I tried not to be in on this, but sometimes I simply couldn't help it. Especially that time you dropped that coke bottle in the middle of National Highway-- because you were too busy eating your fish crackers to properly hold the moist bottle. And the fact that after dropping it, Kace,  and I frantically thinking of what to do-- you pop another cracker into your mouth saying. "Ay! Lai Lai pala to, hindi La La" That moment of "Oh, no--I broke the slingshot" caught on video was priceless-- and the camera man's hysteric laughter to come with it.  But "SUCK EEET" to all of us--- those 8 strikes came about because you took a swing at things. I applaud your tenacity to live. I am looking forward to witnessing more blunders from you Mr, Yuhico. That talk on the rock at the river is something that really stuck. I feel like we are both in the same page of our lives, you get exactly what I say. Yes, I know I lag sometimes and I have trouble finishing my sentences-- thank you for finishing them for me. I was actually telling KC that I think, we'll be really good friends. I hope that does transpire.

Brian Fontanilla, kilabot ng mga LaSallista. You are to me the perfect mix of macho bravado and teddy bear cuddliness. It's just so easy to be around you because you because you are who you are and you say what you feel. There is so much else to discover about you, Panzzian na to tonight! Army is one hell of a lucky girl. Aanakan mo na ba? Oy-oy-oyoyoy!


KC Joaquin, I love you PERIOD. Enough said.

More than anything else, what I miss is being around all of you. Waking up early and waiting for you guys to wake up one by one-- pleasantly surprised for the next face that I see. "Daaaaaash, 430 na!" Having amazing conversations, singing along to sappy love songs and doing the Fonta dance, the Ponti dance, the Embassy dance and the Jaipur dance-- Laughing endlessly, chopping non-stop and perfecting my Suck it jump. Those helping hands that guided us through the difficult trek across all of natures elements--- something I will never forget. Please, balik na tayo.

There is so much else to say, but I can't anymore-- Napakadaldal ko na.

And so this is how it feels to be walking on a dream, I am just in awe of what's in front of me.

Where shall the next Greatest Adventure be?

Thursday, September 3, 2009

A Whole New World

 
    Before Pannzian, life was like a highway-- Long, predictable and monotonous. Yes, the landscape has changed after the long drive but with the distance you've traveled-- it only should. Pretty soon, it all gets old and after 25 years of being on this highway, you wonder -- "How far along till the landscape of life will once again change?" It gets boring after a while and you fall asleep, you wake up and realize its all still the same. There have been parts of the journey where I have been sleeping "Wake me up when we get there." Then there are times you grow impatient, irritated by the long drive and constantly complain and ask "Are we there yet?" Other times, you muster up enough energy to keep your mind focused on the destination and step on the gas cruising at 150 miles per hour, but then the landscape becomes blurry and at such high speeds, you are bound to crash. You get tired and decide to slow down. Is this really all there is on this highway? I feel like I've seen everything there is to see, met everyone that's on this highway with me. You start to take a closer look at what's out there. You notice the flowers along the road, the people selling fruits, the beautiful bridges you are crossing. There might just be more to this highway, if you start looking at whats beside you rather than whats ahead. And then here, here comes The Greatest Adventure of My Life. I'm on the National Highway, the highway of life (hihihihi:)) ) And someone tells me of a dirt road that leads to paradise. Small talk at first, but you don't really believe it. I take the invitation and keep it in my pocket. I think about it, but really I'm too lazy to get out of the car. I'm pretty comfortable sitting here, its safe and I least I know where I'm heading to. Now the dirt road is coming up, and if I don't take the chance now I'll probably miss it-- its pretty hard to turn back, there's a lot of cars rushing behind you. "Oh, what the hell" I say. Stop the car, let go of the wheel and take a chance. I hop on to a dirt bike, driven by Dodong-- An interesting man of 32. Who says he's married-- but not quite, they have an arrangement-- but he's not sure yet. I enjoy the conversation, I don't usually meet people like this on the highway. He drives his bike down the road and then all of a sudden I find myself in the midst of untouched beauty. Trees towering 50 feet high? I say it's 1000 feet, . Rivers winding between the mountains. " A magical and wonderful land with pristine rain forests, blue waters, clear skies" . It was indeed paradise. Who knew? That such a sight to see, an experience to be had was hidden just behind the trees-- The Greatest Adventure of my life waiting just down that dirt road along National Highway? There is so much more of the world yet to see, so many places my feet have not tread.
And so, hiking up to Lover's Falls across rice paddies and river rocks I sing..
I can show you the world
Shining, shimmering, splendid
Tell me princess
Now when did you last let your heart decide?
I can open your eyes
Take you wonder by wonder
Over sideways and under
On a magic carpet ride
A whole new world
A new fantastic point of view
No-one to tell us no
Or where to go
Or say we’re only dreaming

A whole new world
A dazzling place I never knew
But when I’m way up here
It’s crystal clear
That now I’m in a whole new world with you
Unbelievable sights
Indescribable feelings
Soaring, tumbling, free-wheeling
Through an endless diamond sky
A whole new world
(Don’t you dare close your eyes)
A hundred thousand things to see
(Hold your breath it gets better)
I’m like a shooting star
I’ve come so far
I cant go back to where I used to be
A whole new world
(Every turn a surprise)
With new horizons to pursue
(Every moment red letter)
I’ll chase them anywhere there’s time to spare
Let me share this whole new world with you
A whole new world
That's where we’ll be
A thrilling chase
(A wondrous place)
For you and me
That's the greatest adventure of my life so far, I wonder where the next one will be?